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There are four stages in a marriage. First there is an affair, then the marriage, then children and finally the fourth stage- the divorce. It may feel rude, but the truth is that many married couple had at least once in their life thought of getting divorced. Men blame women for having the want for divorce. But the general truth is that women will only leave a marriage if it is unbearable, whereas men will split if they get a better offer.
The saddest part of a divorce is with the children. A separated mother and father can cause many a psychological problems for the younger ones. The effect of divorce varies from child to child depending on many factors. One important factor is the age of children at the time of divorce. A child's character and gender also is to be noted. If the parents were having a big deal of conflict before their divorce it could be worse with the child.
Age of the child
Children under the age of three years may not understand what is happening within their family. Psychological problems will be considerably less in their case. But, if the child was having a special bond with any of the parents, and if it is broken that can cause some problems later on. Divorcing parents should chalk out a plan on who should take care of the child. This will help solve the problem a bit.
Infants
Researches have been made on the impact of divorce on infants. The results are alarming. Many infants, who had their parents separated reportedly loose their appetite and had an upset stomach more than usual. They can sense the changes in the energy level of their parents.
Preschool children
Children up to five years old behave rather strangely towards divorce. They assume that they are the real cause of the separation of their parents. For instance, a preschool child may think that his poor performance in the class test made his parents divorce. These children always bear a fear of being abandoned. The result of a divorce on these kids will be more unusual. They begin to wet beds, become uncooperative and depressed.
School children
The worst thing for an elementary school child is to have his parents divorced. They are old enough to know what is happening in the family, but they are too young to control their agonies. It will be embarrassing for them to have daddy and mummy separated. They may react in an odd manner. It involves grief, apprehension, uncontrollable anger and divided loyalty.
Adolescents
Teenagers know the meaning of divorce in all its sense. They may understand why their parents got separated. But they also express emotions like depression, anger, loneliness and guilt. A divorce in the family will increase the stress level of an adolescent child. They are now confused with the meaning of getting married. Sometimes even a psychological assistance had to be given to these children to get back to life.
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